Are you lost in the weeds or smelling the flowers?

The successes and failures.

The pleasures and pains.

The suffering and celebration.

We travel through these stages at different times and for different reasons, but we all travel through them.

I remember a time when my children were young and the innocent moments of floating on air mattresses on the lake or living room floor picnics held the magic of the simplicity of happiness. Hard struggles were happening in my life, but in those moments, I didn’t notice. My head was up, enjoying the sunshine and the flowers of my life. When things are going well, even weeds can look like flowers and life seems grand.

I also remember a time when my dad was suffering from a terminal illness at the same time my son was struggling in life. I was so deep in the weeds that I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t think. And, at times, I gasped for a breath. Good things were going on in my life during this time, but I couldn’t see them. My head was down, and my heart was buried in the weeds. When life is difficult, it is as if the weeds smother the flowers and hide them from our view.

I have witnessed this many times in life — in my friends, in my family and in myself. It may be the loss of a loved one, loss of a job or a physical illness that causes us to become so lost in the weeds that we hunker down, pulling ourselves closer to the dirt of the situation. We tuck our hearts inward for protection and close our eyes to block the pain. In doing so, we become deeply lost in the weeds.

When life is so heavy with heartache, it is hard to see the flowers. They are there, but the burden of carrying pain makes it difficult to look up. Every step is a step through the thickness of weeds. The roots are tough and treacherous, wrapping themselves around our ankles, and the stalks grow tall and surround us so that all we know, all we feel and all we see are weeds.

The reality is life is a mixture of flowers and weeds. Some years, we have gardens full of bright colors, blooming in our lives. Some years we have more weeds and are bogged down in the trenches of walking through them. We all get a combination throughout our lives.

The longer we live, the more distance we have to look back on. The miles of happy times and the rough terrain of pain. When we look back, we see from the vantage point of an experienced observer. We can see the pattern of life and the lessons we have learned.

There have been many happy times in my life. There have been many times of sadness and pain in my life. I have now come to a space of understanding that we need both. Both happy and sad. Both the weeds and the flowers.

We will all face suffering and setbacks. Without pushing through the weeds, we would not appreciate the delicate beauty of the flowers. We will all experience joy and love. Without the flowers, we would not be motivated to survive when we are lost in the darkness of weeds, knowing that beyond the difficulties of life, there will be the sweet blooming once again.

Start thinking about life.

The highs and lows.

The successes and failures.

The pleasures and pains.

The suffering and celebration.

Where are you standing in life?

Are you lost in the weeds, or are you smelling the flowers?

Pennie’s Life Lesson: When you are lost in the weeds, begin looking for the flowers.